Posts tagged hahaha
Posts tagged hahaha
"You’d struggle to pour water out of a boot with the instructions on the heel"
God DAMN thats some Shakespearean shit right there
new fav insult
but its important
IM SORRY BUT IM DYING THEY LOOK LIKE A BOY BAND
A true scientist
can you tell i am a pro at keeping track of my files
the funniest thing is that the tattoo actually reads “part of an asshole race”
Chocolate and Ice Cream - Plumb
my year 8 students had to do a budgeting activity pretending they were living out of home on $2000 a month and I find this written on there help I can’t fucking breathe
We had to do this and I was partnered with a boy whose parents are a scientist and a doctor. My family spawned the book: Top Drawer Villain - autobiography of a London criminal.
First of all, we had to choose where we would shop. He wanted to buy from Booths. “We are not buying from Booths," I snapped. "Get on Asda’s website right now." His face froze.
“A-Asda?" he whispered. "But that’s where… The Lower Classes shop.”
This was a good start.
We then had to decide on a menu. We started on breakfast. “Toast," he said.
“Toast," I said. "Great. Look, Asda has its own wholemeal—”
“Warburton’s thick-slice white bread. Nothing else. With olive oil.”
“You WHAT?" I choked. "You have olive oil, on your toast, in the morning?”
He frowned. “Who doesn’t?”
“Okay," I said, "but what will the children eat?”
He gaped at me. “The children? We have children?”
We continued. All was well until it came to what we would have on our sandwiches. We even sorted out the children’s lunch - they, of course, would get free school meals. “Yes," he agreed; "if we can’t even afford Bertolli then they can get school meals on the government.”
He asked what dressing we should have on our ham. “Nuh-uh," I said. "Can’t have ham. I’m vegetarian.”
“But I’m not.”
“Yes, but we’re married and we can only afford one sandwich filler so it has to be vege—”
“Of course we’re married! You’re devout Christian - how do you think I convinced you to have children?”
He shook his head, frowning. “Well I want ham. You’ll have to put back the washing powder - I need ham on my sandwiches.”
We continued. Finally, it was dinner. “Okay," he said, clearly thinking hard; "for dinner, we can have… Chicken nuggets and… Beans?”
“Vegetarian nuggets then. And beans.”
“We need vegetables. The children have to have a balanced diet.”
“You and your children!" he yelled, and the whole class looked around.
“They’re your children too!" I screamed back.
He leapt to his feet, shaking his head and looking distraught. “I don’t believe it - I don’t believe you! I wouldn’t have your children!”
“Please," I cried, standing up also. "Don’t—”
“I want a divorce!”
And he walked out of the classroom.
The teacher stood up and stared between me and the door through which he had vanished. “I’m sorry," I whispered, "but we couldn’t do it any more. There were just too many differences - I can’t live with someone who thinks champagne is a budget.”
I can’t wait to see this guy when he gets to university.
holy shit that’s glorious
Playing a co-op game for the first time with friends who are very good at it
THIS WAS HER OPENING QUESTION.
That is the face of a man who has never been called on his bullshit.
ABC pulling out the big guns while they still have money to do so
This is Princess Dead Pool. My 3 year old told me EXACTLY how she wanted the costume to look and walked me through the entire thing, bossing me around. It was so much fun.
Always reblog Princess Deadpool.
THIS IS SO CUTE
All the deadpools posing with princess deadpool give me life.
everyone’s grandparents seem to have really cute stories of how they met, and like my grandparents met when my grandma was running away from police during a protest and she jumped on the back of my grandads motorcycle and just screamed “DRIVE FUCKING DRIVE”
I dunno man I think that story’s pretty fuckin cute.
Luminol is used by forensic investigators to detect trace amounts of blood left at crime scenes as it reacts with iron found in hemoglobin. It is used by biologists in cellular assays for the detection of copper, iron, and cyanides, in addition to the detection of specific proteins by Western Blot.
For analysis of an area, luminol can be sprayed evenly across the area, and trace amounts of an activating oxidant will cause the luminol to emit a blue glow that can be seen in a darkened room. The glow lasts for about 30 seconds, but the effect can be documented by a long-exposure photograph. It is important that the spraying be evenly applied to avoid creating a slanted, or biased impression, such as blood traces appearing to be more concentrated in areas which received more spray. The intensity of the glow does not indicate the original amount present, but only the distribution of trace amounts of substances left in the area.